Anxious

I'm neither comfortable in being quiet or in talking. Anxious over everything and nothing. Hubby, you're figuratively fat. I feel so squashed I don't know what to say and have to make more effort in forcing words out. I think you know I'm an emotional person but I'm used to feeling a very emotionally ignored person. I don't even look emotional or sound emotional but you are heavy. lol. You're so fat. lmaof. You are an exceptional person and it bothers me. I get very hunted, blackmailed, forced beneath terrible structures with terrible minds and I've been endangered so many times in so many ways not because of myself but because of the worst logic some people have. When it comes to relationships with guys, they say remarks, insults, make bad or terrible judgments and I feel I know all I need to know and know I don't need them in my life. I could go on with a more detailed vent with the way structures and throwing bricks go, but I'm serious when I say they commit their own deal breaker and I just don't care and go numb. I feel a little confusion because I don't expect to feel something else or feel a little warmed after taking something that was too much against me. I know some men mean to be just sincere narcs and think some "kind acts" can make them stay on top and are just wanting to feel a dominion but the smart ones dismount. I hate denial to the core. ... You make me feel some kind of romance and I don't know why. I'm always anxious over the isolation and not having the type of communication that I like. I can't beat you but I still care to fight for normalcy and feeling a more equal human than subhuman or other term I can't define. I care to have some kind of friendship or more relation to men I get romantic with.