Tuesday, September 22, 2015
Hi David
Or, Dick Tracy.... hhahaha no, you don't seem to be too sincere of interrogation. Curious and in wonder about me.... smiles. Could be bad though if you mean to hand me off. I'm going to annoy you and be literal first: I think the singer isn't too bad. He has a good musical and mood vibe in his music. Seems like a man's man where a random man listening would be getting himself prepped and pepped in the mirror while he gets ready. lol..... figuratively.... Because YOU want to go there. I really don't think I would want to seek any kind of relationship or (looking down) sexual relationship with Ian. I won't deny I think he has a sexual attractiveness to him, but I really don't think he and I would ever work or that he is my type at all. ...... Are you really that suspicious when I take the short cut route to the dance class? I guess I'll have to take the long way and be even more avoidant because of you and the fact I am talking about him. awe, is this the "Every breathe you take?" It would be mean if you were meaning to pimp me. You had a nice way of getting in my head last night too. There is something there where I will always question if my mind (or someone else in my mind) is playing tricks on me. David, I am being serious about being physical, in the flesh, person to person. I know I have yet to watch "Aquarius." I know it isn't that I'm person to person serious with anyone else right now, so why not? I just can't stand those very distant types of relationships anymore. I want and need to want and need a man in my life who is actually going to be there, physically, person to person. I don't know how you noticed me or why you want to keep me around the way you do. It means something to me to an extent, but I just get so fed up with the system and structure of it all that I lose interest in time. I'll be getting Aquarius soon. I know I'm looking at you and not Sam.
Thursday, September 3, 2015
David
It isn't always easy being vulnerable with someone, especially when it isn't a private and personal conversation. I know I have more than enough predators and enemies who watch me and would go through any distance to manipulate, black mail, or want suffocatingly control me that much harder. I know Sam's violent and vain psycho is still out there running around. There are many times I have wanted a private conversation with someone, but I can't always have it my way. Anyhoo, I have already been let down by a lot of Don Drapers. Not all Don Drapers want me to leave them. I can tolerate a Don Draper for so long until I have to try to do whatever I can to beat him off of me. Most Don Drapers have never wanted to understand the slave they were wanting to make out of me. They were never going to understand just how unfair their expectations were knowing they were always going to be too prejudiced, snobby, and honestly rejecting. It's just not fair for a Don Draper to expect a woman to stick around knowing he will never fully accept her or make her feel like she is more than loved enough. Right now, I don't mean to come across as TOO MUCH of a manipulator. I've just been around the block a few times and know the way things typically go. I don't know why I have continued to attract the famous and the wealthy. I just simply do sometimes, and sometimes it upsets me when they do because I know how impossible they are and how much of a demand and center of attention they are. You had your own way of making your own reference in your 4th show about taking a woman's baby making years away..... I think it would be too judgmental to make you feel the wrath of your own comment. You havn't killed me too much yet over the wealth I don't have, and besides me seeing some other signs, I felt left guessing more than anything. Are you really serious about me or want to marry me? I'm really not sold into believing that about you. Unless you step outside the typical structure of the Don Drapers, really throw yourself on me and having demanding expectations of faithfulness (I'm not necessarily saying "yes" to a marriage proposal either), I'm not going to be convinced how serious you are. You can't always do things in a structured way or through people or signs. You have to physically be there. The actual person I am has to be recognized. I know I don't want to come across as TOO Manipulative or even want to put pressure on you during your show. I will still be there and if I'm anything to you, I'll be a horny fan who is there to have a good time. I'm keeping you in my sights and on my mind, but I'm not going to lead myself on to you too much or get my hopes up too much anymore for you. I plan on waiting to mess around with other men after the concert. Who knows when anything happens or whether or not anything ever will happen. Anyhoo, that is the spill of what is on my mind for now
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